I Told You I Was Crazy
by TheQueenOfGleeks
Summary: Finn comes back to McKinley to get domething from Will's office, when he finds Ryder, alone in the choir room. Ryder tells Finn about all his secrets, he thinks he's going crazy, and Finn tries to convince him otherwise. (NOT ROMANTIC! FRIENDHIP!) Rated T for swears and mentions of sexual abuse.


**Setting: In the choir room, after Ryder admits he was molested (Lights Out)**

**Characters: Finn, Ryder, and mentions of Marley**

**Plot: Finn comes back to McKinely because he left something in Will's office, and finds Ryder crying. Ryder admits to Finn that he was molested, and they have a heart-to-heart.**

**Genre: Frienship/Hurt/Comfort**

Finn had forgotten his jacket in Will's office, and came back to McKinely to get it, when he found Ryder crying, alone in the choir room.

"R-Ryder?" Finn stuttered out, surprised to see the younger boy.

"Oh, uh, hey Finn," Ryder replied, nervously wiping the tears from his face, hoping Finn wouldn't notice.

"Dude, what happened?"

"N-Nothing," Ryder lied.

Finn walked over to Ryder, and sat down next to him, "Don't lie to me."

Ryder sighed heavily.

"Is it Marley?" he asked, "Did something happen with her?"

"Finn, Marley doesn't feel the same way, we both know that."

"Then what happened Ryder," Finn asked, "You know you can trust me."

"You'll think I'm crazy," Ryder chuckled darkly, "Everyone does."

"I doubt that," Finn smiled, trying to cheer his younger friend up.

"Then why did I spend the past half-hour in Ms. Pillsbury's office? Why is Marley pitying me? Why-" He cut himself off, "Never mind."

"Ryder. Tell me what happened." Finn demanded.

"It was a long time ago. It doesn't matter anymore," Ryder said, trying to convince Finn of it.

"Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?" Finn interogated.

"What are you? My shrink?"

"No, I'm your friend. And I know you're lying to me."

"Fine," Ryder sighed, "But don't say I didn't warn you."

Ryder paused, then said, "When I was eleven I was molested by my babysitter," he didn't even look up to see Finn's reaction, "S-She just walked in on me in the shower, a-and t-touched me. And-"

Ryder couldn't take it anymore.

He stood up, and kicked over the chair in anger. A few seconds later, calming down slightly, he turned to Finn and said, "Now do you believe that I'm crazy?"

"Heh. Kicking over a chair doesn't exactly make you crazy, Ryder. And if it does, then I'm certifiable," he said, chuckling slightly.

"Not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

"I have absolutely no fucking idea," Ryder sighed, sitting down again. "I-I just. I'm so damn done with all of this."

"Ryder," Finn sighed.

"I just can't stop thinking about what they said," Ryder mumbled.

"Ryder, who?"

"Sam and Artie," Ryder clarified. "They said I should be proud of it, like I'm superior or something. I-I just... I feel like there's something wrong with me, like I'm overreacting. I don't even know. If I was stronger, or did something differently, maybe I wouldn't have let something like this happen to me. Maybe I would of let it ruin me."

"You are not ruined Ryder."

"Really Finn? Can you honestly tell me that? My grades are shit, I have freaking panic attacks, nightmares, the only girl I ever trusted fell for my best friend, I couldn't even fucking kill myself right," Ryder rambled.

"Y-You tried to kill yourself?"

"It was eigth grade," Ryder sighed regretably, "I was in a dark place, still trying to cope with everything, I was sick of all the crap I was taking, and I litterally thought I had no one to talk to. So I did it. I was just done.

"How did you, uh?" Finn asked nervously.

Ryder rolled up his sleeves, revealing the scars from his attempt.

"Ryder," Finn sighed.

"And you thought I transfered 'cause of my shit grades," Ryder smirked in regret, "No, it was recommended by my _therapist_. She thought the 'enviorment' was 'unhealthy' for me. Heh. Deny it all you want. Im crazy."

"Seeing a therapist doesnt make you crazy," Finn reassured.

"Do these?" Ryder said, pulling a vile out of his bag.

Finn raised an eyebrow.

"Anti-depressants," Ryder muttered.

"Ryder Lynn. I hunted you down to be Danny in that damn musical for a reason. I knew this Glee club needed a leader. And when I saw you at that football feild, I saw talent. And when I saw you in the musical with Marley, I saw your passion. And when you told me you were dyslexic, I could tell that you hated because you knew you couldnt just handle it by yourself. But what you just told me, Ryder, shows me that you've been to hell and back and you SURVIVED. So dont throw your life to hell because your sick of it. Because if you die, I will hate you for it," Finn smiled, "And I know Marley would too."

Ryder smirked, "She doesn't feel the same way, dude."

Finn rolled his eyes, "Keep believing that."

There was a short pause, then Ryder said, "Thank you, Finn."

Finn pulled him in for a friendly hug, "You, my friend, are very welcome."

"You are a little crazy though," Finn smirked.

"Sanity's boring," Ryder replied, slightly laughing.

**Author's Note: I honestly not sure if this is any good, but I always wished Ryder & Finn had more of a friendship on the show. I know that can't really happen now, Rest In Peace Cory, but I love to read & write fanfiction about 'em. :) **

**Thanks! Please Review!**

**~QueenOfGleeks**


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